I’ve been wanting to expand into the realm of photo-manipulation and vector art. I’ve been using Fireworks since 2006, and it’s still by far my favorite, but I recently obtained a copy of Photoshop and Illustrator (and the creative suite, because of Adobe’s cool new subscription thing) and decided that it would be a good idea to acquaint myself with working with them, because if I was able to get them down, I think my digital art would go a lot further.
I charted out my empire the other night. I think it’ll help me stay focused and remember the big picture – I can add to it as needed which is a nice aspect. I have bits of ideas and goals and big picture stuff strewn across various notes and entries in my journal, but having a graphical representation seems to make it that much more real.
I don’t know much about building empires, but this makes sense to me – and it’s nice to look at.
I found this on pinterest today and it hit me. A lot of the time I feel so young (I am young :P) and lost and like none of the stuff I’m doing really means much, because there’s so much out there I don’t know, and I’m making so many mistakes that I don’t even know about because I’m so inexperienced. But then I saw this. Sometimes I do want to quit, and just hole up and live under the blankets – I want to give up my heart and stop pouring it into paint and canvas and words because I look back on them and blush. I don’t really know what “success” is for me or how close I am to “achieving” it (if that’s even something you can achieve), but I still paint and draw and write because I *like* it, I *want* it, and even though I have so much to learn that sometimes I don’t even want to think about it – I know it brings me closer to myself, and discovering the girl inside who knows me, and knows who I am and what I’m capable of. Sometimes I get lost because my secondary motivation is to help out and honestly I’m thinking that it might be a bit of hinderance at times and I feel like I need to get back to just creating for the sake of creating, and creating because I love it, I need it, and it becomes me.
I don’t know what I’ll do or be in 5 years, 10 years, or next year. Hopefully I’ll be a better artist, a more loving person, and a better friend. I know there’s so much I don’t know…but I think I need to take the time and look at exactly how far I’ve come, in so many different aspects and parts of myself. I’m becoming me.
How far have you come in your hopes, ambitions, and journey? I bet it’s a lot more than you’d expect when you stop and think about it.